🎙️ Wired for Sound: Voices from the Cochlear Implant Wellness Collective

 🎙️ Wired for Sound: Voices from the Cochlear Implant Wellness Collective

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I Couldn’t Explain Then, But I Understand Now: What My Parents Didn’t Know About My Life as a CI User

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I Couldn’t Explain Then, But I Understand Now: What My Parents Didn’t Know About My Life as a CI User As a cochlear implant user who grew up navigating an often misunderstood world of sound, I wrote this to help parents and others see the parts we often can’t explain as children. When I was a little girl, I couldn’t explain what I was feeling. I didn't have the words then. I couldn’t explain why I kept saying “huh?” or “I didn’t hear you.” I couldn’t explain why I looked blank, why I didn’t respond, or why I got tired so easily in noisy places. My parents, concerned, suddenly took me to an audiologist to check if there were any problems. I could hear, but I didn't know how to explain my struggles and the barriers I faced, because I didn't know what natural hearing was like. But as I grew up, through countless conversations with friends and dedicated research into the science behind my experiences, I finally began to understand. And I wish my parents knew these things earlie...
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I Act Like I Hear You: The Hidden Toll of Trying

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 I Act Like I Hear You: The Hidden Toll of Trying Sometimes, I nod when I didn’t really understand. I laugh when others laugh, even if I didn’t catch the joke. I rehearse responses in my head because I’m not sure if I really heard you right. I act like I’m hearing more than I am. This isn’t lying. It’s survival . In psychology, it’s called auditory-verbal masking or effortful socialization-  a term used to describe what many deaf and hard-of-hearing people do to fit into the hearing world, especially those of us with cochlear implants or hearing aids. It means mimicking behaviors of hearing individuals responding quickly, maintaining eye contact, laughing at the right times even when you’re exhausted, even when you’re lost. We do it to pass. To avoid being left out. To not be the “inconvenient” one in the group. But there’s a cost. 💢 The Psychology Behind the Mask In social and cognitive psychology, this behavior mirrors autistic masking and code-switching in margina...
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When Listening Drains Me: The Side of Deafness No One Sees

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 When Listening Drains Me: The Side of Deafness No One Sees People often assume listening is easy. That if you have ears or even a cochlear implant you can just hear, respond, and move on. But for me, listening is work. It takes energy, focus, and emotional strength especially in noisy or social situations. In group conversations , it’s the hardest. If I miss a word, I turn to someone next to me for help. But even that feels risky. They may think I’m disturbing them, interrupting, or not paying attention. But the truth is I’m trying harder than anyone realizes. And when I can’t keep up, it hits me like a storm. A flood of frustration, helplessness, sadness… sometimes all at once. My brain feels like it’s on overload , and I lose control over how I feel. The world becomes too loud outside , and too heavy inside. What I’ve come to realize is this isn’t just personal. It’s actually something psychologists call listening fatigue . People who use hearing aids or cochlear implants have...
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